A Week of Distancing and Involvement

July, amidst downpours, 
resuscitation of the schedule, I return to work.
“The sky is raging all week, rain!
Puddles of water in the park,
I would cycle across them, 
after a thorough shower in the rain…”

The wound, then and now, 
aching, but never fatal.
Keeping me distanced
from all that could be carried along,
but never was.
“And I would bask in the sun at dusk, 
in the parks, among them all, 
and wish they’d return tomorrow.”

Much was in the air, as I watched
in the midst of it all:
a last chance to stay on path, 
for what time was left,
and bear the inevitable recession, 
of what all hopes I held 
as the date of fruition was delayed,
it would not come anyway,
and I had known all along.
It was time, to put all warmth, 
and seething passion to end.

“Where are the others?”
Go back.
Trace the path back from where you came.
Don’t wander off again.
Stay, 
despite all that you hesitate to say, 
and keep in your head.

A hum of the inner workings of the clock, 
there’s persistent urgency here, 
unlike in overgrown recesses of the park.
The channels of water are all but stopped,
and a cemented pavement is made, 
and the park lets in more light,
there’s no overgrowth to be found today.
The clock rushes the mind, 
dissolves all visions that override the sight, 
and the leaned back head.
This is no moment for rest.

The night continues, 
“My summer break starts early,
I stay home for more than a month!”
and the summer does too.
But everyone has moved along, 
and those that stay, might not for long.
And there’s a fear of everything coming undone
some day, when I’m away,
or immersed in finding my old home,
when it rains,
or when returning home after a long day.
There’s a fear of straying away
and becoming someone else,
 to rise above the crowd, 
or merge at best.

“What do I become, what is my plan of escape?”
In time, you will understand,
when there’s no recognition to be found,
and there’s much apathy in the crowd,
when the flag you raise is not seen, 
and the voice goes unheard,
regardless of blood on the shirt, 
and the same staring eyes remain, 
and you’re alone amidst it all.